Category: Glug Glug

The Alien went to her first ever Matric Dance this past weekend. Her “date” is a friend of her boyfriend. Yes, you heard me, boyfriend. The silly child did not believe me when I told her 16 was far too young to do the whole dating thing. Aliens know everything though and my every effort to stop the tomfoolery came to naught. Sigh.
Continue reading More than Just a Wine Thing

•            Weatherforecaster: Deciding in the morning if the clouds are going to dissipate or not.  Often the deadline to put a load of washing on arrives and the sun has either appeared or disappeared.  What to do? Bloody Durban weather.
•           Clothepeg connoisseur:  Apparently you can’t just hang your clothes up any old way. There is a right way and a wrong way. Who knew?  I just hang everything upside down.  It seems right for about 50% of the garments. Oh, and God help the lady that does not fold her washing with military precision when taking it down.
•       Iron technician:  Not all irons are created equally.  Besides which – steamers are the next best thing, not irons. As far as I am concerned, if an iron last longer than a year it is simply brilliant.
•       Dishwashing machine expert:  To rinse or not to rinse before packing in?  This argument gets discussed more frequently than the topic of husbands and becomes far too heated for my liking. Watch this space. This could be what starts WW3
•           Detergent detective:  Finding the latest, new,improved wunder-cleaner is essential. Once found it then requires stalking of the cleaning lady to ensure that she only uses the recommended amount and not the whole bottle in one day. The stalking is essential as the said bottle of phenomenal cleaner costs more than your entire month’s grocery budget.
•       Pantry science:  Not all tins live up to their expiry dates. Knowing which ones you can use after those pesky dates takes years of experience.  Rotating produce and stock control requires meticulousness attention to detail.  I don’t have a pantry. What a relief.
•       Human Resources Degree:  Actually, discussing the management of household cleaning staff requires a book, not a blog.  The stories that get shared each month have me either gasping in horror or gasping for breath they make me laugh so much.  I am so grateful for my sweet, short sighted Gladys.

I know you all want to know exactly what this “exclusive” club, to which I have belonged to for over 8 years, is all about. I have received e-mails and sms messages begging to hear more. So here goes.

Drumroll please…

It is tricky to introduce such a diverse group of characters. As we all have school going children, I thought I would compare each member to a person within a school. Rather apt as a school is a small community within a community, like the wine club, and school is also an experience that we will never forget no matter how old we get. Even if the wine club ever disbanded – the memories (and 1,762 932 photos) will stay with all of us forever.

In no particular order and relating to their character within wine club only:

Les – The Headmistress
Always takes on the leadership role. Not scared to kick our arses to get things done to her exacting standards. Don’t mess with Les, or else!

Jax – the Class Mother and Head of the Parents Advisory Committee.
She may have 2 sons but Jax would mother a stray cockroach. If anyone has a boo-boo or needs to be cheered up – Mamma Jax is always willing and able.

Jules – the Class Clown
You can hear her infectious laugher down every corridor. She sees the funny side of any situation so you just can’t help yourself but start laughing with her about almost anything.

Carol – the School Rebel
Carol is on the look-out for any opportunity to bend or break the rules. Why? Because it’s fun, that’s why! She does not need a reason, does she?

Vix – the Student Councillor
The pragmatic, sensible voice of reason. A spade is a spade, so do not even think of calling it a shovel. She is always a willing and empathetic listener but don’t expect her to sugar-coat the truth.

Lynette – The PR Officer
Always immaculately turned out, she flits from one social gathering to the next, ensuring that everyone she meets feels like a super-star after 5 minutes in her company

Me – the Teachers Pet
No – it ain’t because I am so incredibly likeable – it’s just because I do what I am told! I’m too scared of getting into trouble with this dynamic group of party animals!

Now let me re-iterate. These descriptions are based on behaviour within wine club only. (Sorry, writing a disclaimer clause sounds like hard work, so forget it) Between us we have 13 children ranging from 2 years old to 19 years old with me being the exception, having only 1 child. There is one laat- lammetjie who still has to turn 40, otherwise we have all reached that milestone and celebrated each others 40th birthdays together.

We are all married and should all be eternally grateful that our long suffering husbands just shake their heads now when wine club comes along each month. I personally think that they are jealous but, hey, no-one is stopping them from forming some kind of club or other – as long as they are available to babysit on wine club nights.

Of late, we are obligated to get dressed up based on some or other theme which is decided by drawing seriously silly options out of a hat at the beginning of the year. I am sure that some of those theme options are revenge for the inevitable hangover and lack of productivity that some of us suffer the day after wine club.

A different member hosts the wine club meeting each month and they are responsible for cooking and presenting the food and decorating their home in accordance with the pre-determined, ludicrous theme. Each person has to dress according to the theme and bring along a bottle of wine.

Oh, I almost forgot… the wine.

At the first meeting I attended, there was a John Platter wine guide, a notebook with comments on all the wines that had been tasted and a special wine opener that did the rounds with each meeting. Not quite sure why, but now the smoothness, bouquet, aroma, vintage and even colour of the wine is unimportant! We sommer just drink!!

Clearly it is no longer the quality of the wine that keeps us coming back each month – it is the quality of the friendship.

I say “CHEERS!” and may you all find a circle of friends, no matter how miscellaneous or random, and enjoy the pleasure of laughing, sharing and “whining” together.

No, I am not going to get all religious on you (although I do believe in thanking the Big Man for all the things we sometimes take for granted; health, happiness, friends, family…)

I am talking about expressing appreciation to the folk who are “pioneers” in showing their support by being the first person on my Facebook Page and the first person to be a follower on my blog.

Round of applause goes to Carol (first follower) and Les (first fan)
Of course they just both happen to be members of the Glug Glug Wine Club so a bottle of “Live-a-Little” ravishing red seemed an appropriate gift for them, don’t you think?